Management is not just for managers, just as leadership is not just for leaders.
We all manage, and we all lead; these are not actions reserved for only those people who happen to hold these “positions” in a company. I personally think of management and leadership as callings, and we all get these callings to manage and lead at different times, and to different degrees.
Considered another way, I believe we can all learn to be more self-governing through the disciplines of great management and great leadership; these are concepts that can give us wonderful tenets to live and work by.
For instance, these are what I’ve come to think of as Twelve Rules for Self-Management. Show me a business where everyone lives and works by self-managing, and I’ll bet it’s a business destined for greatness.
1. Live by your values, whatever they are. You confuse people when you don’t, because they can’t predict how you’ll behave.
2. Speak up! No one can “hear” what you’re thinking without you be willing to stand up for it. Mind-reading is something most people can’t do.
3. Honor your own good word, and keep the promises you make. If not, people eventually stop believing most of what you say, and your words will no longer work for you.
4. When you ask for more responsibility, expect to be held fully accountable. This is what seizing ownership of something is all about; it’s usually an all or nothing kind of thing, and so you’ve got to treat it that way.
5. Don’t expect people to trust you if you aren’t willing to be trustworthy for them first and foremost. Trust is an outcome of fulfilled expectations.
6. Be more productive by creating good habits and rejecting bad ones. Good habits corral your energies into a momentum-building rhythm for you; bad habits sap your energies and drain you.
7. Have a good work ethic, for it seems to be getting rare today. Curious, for those “old-fashioned” values like dependability, timeliness, professionalism and diligence are prized more than ever before. Be action-oriented. Seek to make things work. Be willing to do what it takes.
8. Be interesting. Read voraciously, and listen to learn, then teach and share everything you know. No one owes you their attention; you have to earn it and keep attracting it.
9. Be nice. Be courteous, polite and respectful. Be considerate. Manners still count for an awful lot in life, and thank goodness they do.
10. Be self-disciplined. That’s what adults are supposed to “grow up” to be.
11. Don’t be a victim or a martyr. You always have a choice, so don’t shy from it: Choose and choose without regret. Look forward and be enthusiastic.
12. Keep healthy and take care of yourself. Exercise your mind, body and spirit so you can be someone people count on, and so you can live expansively and with abundance.
Managers will tell you that they don’t really need to manage people who live by these rules; instead, they can devote their attentions to managing the businesses in which they all thrive. Chances are it will also be a place where great leaders are found.
I welcome your thoughts
While there are numerous books, courses, and online trainings for improving your managerial skills, seldom do they address the psychological underbelly of wise and wonderful management. That’s understandable since they aren’t created by people with a psychological background.
But over the past many years we’ve seen how understanding and incorporating the following psychological truths have enabled good managers to become great:
1 - Everyone Knows How To Follow
Everyone was once a small child whose very existence depended on following their parents or other caretakers. So the act of following is built into each and every one of us. And while some chronological adults rebel against managerial leadership in an unconscious carryover from their youth, the vast majority of people welcome clear, supportive leadership they can readily follow.
2 - Your Followers Want You To Exhibit Strong Leadership
When a manager can be counted on to provide clear directions, clear expectations, clear rewards and clear critique in response to outcomes, s/he can provide a confident-making platform for everyone on the team. Being nice, wishy washy, or distracted by the company’s internal politics raises grave concerns for the future of the team’s project as well as anxiety about management’s missing guidance about current expectations.
3 - Your Team Wants You To Lead Not Rely On Their Opinion
While team input and collaboration are extremely important and invaluable, all too often managers abdicate their leadership role in favor of “consulting” with people on the team to try to handle dicey hiring problems, team restructuring, or other insecurities that are not the business of that manager’s team members.
4 - Forget About Being A Buddy
Some managers, uncomfortable with their senior status and leadership role, believe that becoming friends and buddies with their team members will empower those who report to them. Actually, nothing is further from the truth. Role confusion makes for team members’ job confusion which creates organizational confusion.
5 - Trying Too Hard To Save An Employee Endangers Your Whole Team
Well meaning managers can often get caught up in trying to rescue a team member whose behavior and/or output is insufficient, incorrect, or injurious to the well being of the team. They may have recruited and/or hired this individual. They may have had great hopes for this person’s career and it’s now a blow to their sense of competence to have to concede that the person needs to be let go. But letting go must become a must-do in order to protect the well being of the other team members and the team’s output.
6 - Big Visions Do Not Make For Wise Guidance
Your team needs wise and caring guidance for execution of your project vision, whatever it is. Merely providing a big vision leaves everyone scrambling to guess at what is expected, demoralizing and rendering insecure what might otherwise be an excellent team. Remember, everyone knows how to follow. Give them clear, empowering guidelines and most people will knock themselves out to produce what you want from them.
While there are certainly many other psychological truths about excellent management, these six will get you started thinking about what’s most wanted and expected of you from your followers—who by and large want to please and impress you.
What other psychologically-oriented qualities do you think are essential?
(Photo: Business meetings eventspaceportland/Flickr)
Judith Sherven, PhD and her husband Jim Sniechowski, PhD
1. “Good branding without a good business plan is like prettying up a duck with no feathers. It may look good but it ain’t gonna fly.” Paul Provost, August 2010
2. “For a business not to advertise is like winking at a girl in the dark. You know what you are doing but no one else does.” Stuartt H. Britt, US advertising consultant
3. “The objective of all advertising is to buy new customers at a profit. Learn what your customers cost and what they buy…spend all of your ammunition where it counts.” Claude Hopkins-Scientific Advertising (1923)
4. “Nobody counts the number of ads you run; they just remember the impression you make.”– Bill Bernbach
5. “Nobody reads ads. People read what interests them, and sometimes it’s an ad.”- Howard Luck Gossage
6. “The only people who care about advertising are the people who work in advertising”– George Parker
7. “In advertising, not to be different is virtually suicidal” – Bill Burnbach
8. “Don’t find customers for your product. Find products for your customers” – Seth Godin.
9. “Give them quality. That’s the best kind of advertising.” – Milton Hershey
10. “If you can’t explain it to a six year old, you don’t understand it well enough yourself” – Albert Einsteen
11. “If you want to understand how a lion hunts, don’t go to the zoo. Go to the jungle.” – Jim Stengal
12.“The aim of marketing is to know and understand the customer so well the product or service fits him and sells itself.”- Peter Drucker
13. “In our factory, we make lipstick. In our advertising, we sell hope.”-Peter Nivio Zarlenga
14. “I don’t know the rules of grammar… If you’re trying to persuade people to do something, or buy something, it seems to me you should use their language, the language they use every day, the language in which they think. We try to write in the vernacular.”– David Ogilvy
15. “Don’t tell me how good you make it; tell me how good it makes me when I use it.” – Leo Burnett
16. “On the average, five times as many people read the headline as read the body copy. When you have written your headline, you have spent eighty cents out of your dollar.” – David Ogilvy
17. “People spend money when and where they feel good” – Walt Disney
18. “Half the money I spend on advertising is wasted, and the problem is I do not know which half.” Lord Leverhulme, British founder of Unilever and philanthropist
19. “In marketing I’ve seen only one strategy that can’t miss — and that is to market to your best customers first, your best prospects second and the rest of the world last.” – John Romero
20. “The philosophy behind much advertising is based on the old observation that every man is really two men — the man he is and the man he wants to be.” – William Feather
21. “In order for you to profit from your mistakes, you have to go out and make some.”- Unknown
22. “Eighty percent of success is showing up.” – Woody Allen
23. “Vision without action is a daydream. Action without vision is a nightmare.” - Japanese Proverb
24. “They may forget what you said, but they will never forget how you made them feel.” – Carl W. Buechner
25. ”There is nothing more difficult for a truly creative painter than to paint a rose, because before he can do so he has first to forget all the roses that were ever painted.” – Henri Matisse
Sales and Marketing Quotes by industry experts
26. “Simplicity is the ultimate form of sophistication” – Leonardo Da Vinci
27. Business has only two functions – marketing and innovation. – Phil Kolter
28. Marketing is inherently about producing results – either financial or otherwise. - Geoff Smith
29. In Marketing there are those who satisfy needs and those who create wants. – Juan Carlos Castillo
30. Every advertisement should be thought of as a contribution to the complex symbol which is the brand image. - David Ogilvy
31. The more facts you tell, the more you sell. An advertisement’s chance for success invariably increases as the number of pertinent merchandise facts included in the advertisement increases. – Dr. Charles Edwards
32. Overused words do not work. Instead of relying on words at all, offer evidence. Offer the compelling stories – the case studies, awards, business growth, achievements – that make those adjectives unnecessary. – Harry Beckwith
33. The biggest mistake we see companies make when they first hit Twitter is to think about it as a channel to push out information. – Tim O’Reilly & Sarah Milsteinco
34. Don’t be afraid to get creative and experiment with your marketing. – Mike Volpe
35. Audiences everywhere are tough. They don’t have time to be bored or browbeaten by orthodox, old fashioned advertising. Craig Davis
36. Never write an advertisement which you wouldn’t want your family to read. You wouldn’t tell lies to your own wife. Don’t tell them to mine. - David Ogilvy
37. Promise, large promise, is the soul of an advertisement. – Samuel Johnson
38. Search, a marketing method that didn’t exist a decade ago, provides the most efficient and inexpensive way for businesses to find leads. - John Battelle
39. If you don’t believe in your product, or if you’re not consistent and regular in the way you promote it, the odds of succeeding go way down. The primary function of the marketing plan is to ensure that you have the resources and the wherewithal to do what it takes to make your product work. – Jay Levinson
40. “If I asked my customers what they wanted they would have said a faster horse” – Henry Ford
41. “It is the new and different that is always most vulnerable to market research” – Malcolm Gladwell, ‘Blink’
42. “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.” - Wayne Gretzky
43. “Marketing takes a day to learn. Unfortunately it takes a lifetime to master.” – Phil Kolter
44. “Nike is a marketing-oriented company, and the product is our most important marketing tool.” – Phil Knight, CEO of Nike
45. “Marketing is too important to be left to the marketing department.” -David Packard
46. “Internal marketing is probably much more important than external marketing. That’s even more true today than it’s ever been.” – Tom Stewart
47. “Marketing is a very good thing, but it shouldn’t control everything. It should be the tool, not that which dictates.” -Nicolas Roeg
48. “Telling lies does not work in advertising.” - Tim Bell
49. “That’s the kind of ad I like, facts, facts, facts.” – Samuel Goldwyn
50. ”The greatest thing to be achieved in advertising, in my opinion, is believability, and nothing is more believable than the product itself.” - Leo Burnett
All companies in an industry can use the same technologies, build the same buildings — so really the differentiating factor in business is the people in a company.
Hiring, training and motivating employees is key to making your company distinctively superior.
1. Hiring. Be patient and hire the employees that are the best fit for the position and your company. Ensure the skills and motivation to succeed are there. Require references from a former boss, peer and director report, if applicable. Very importantly, check the references yourself. This ensure continuity between the interview and the references.
Offer company orientation, with basic information on the company, as well as how business is done by the organization.
Train on required, special or specific technical knowledge. For more senior positions, provide an on-boarding sheet listing the basic knowledge needed, and ask employees to initial when they have found and understood the information.
3. Coaching. Pay attention to the strengths and weaknesses of employees. Be a cheerleader on their strengths and accomplishments. Help them figure out how to shift the paradign on the weaknesses so they become strengths. For example, being quiet is not a strength in sales – however, listening is key to selling effectively.
4. Set the tone for a fun, human work environment.
Have some fun on the job. Some moments of lightness
Keep the interactions human; have a heart. Take a genuine interest in your folks. Caring goes further than knowing in so many ways.
Help your employees succe. Let them do their job, and give them the support and resources they need. Be sure they are recognized when you reap the benefits.And do not throw them under the bus.
Arrange some informal, outside activities: bowling, lunch off-site. I even know an HR Manager who used to take employees to breakfast after an early meeting. These events allow us to get to know each other beyond work, as people, which helps to build trust.
5. Throw down a positive, achievable challenge.
Your competitors are the real challenge but some friendly internal competition can get the juices flowing. Try competitions with low stake awards, such as taking the winners or team to lunch.
Be sure that any compensation, evaluations are tied to achievable goals – or the goals will cease to motivate.
Life isn’t about getting and having, it’s about giving and being. –Kevin Kruse
Whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe, it can achieve. –Napoleon Hill
Strive not to be a success, but rather to be of value. –Albert Einstein
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference. –Robert Frost
I attribute my success to this: I never gave or took any excuse. –Florence Nightingale
You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take. –Wayne Gretzky
I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed. –Michael Jordan
The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity. –Amelia Earhart
Every strike brings me closer to the next home run. –Babe Ruth
Definiteness of purpose is the starting point of all achievement. –W. Clement Stone
The past is a ghost, the future a dream. All we ever have is now. –Bill Cosby
Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans. –John Lennon
We become what we think about. –Earl Nightingale
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do, so throw off the bowlines, sail away from safe harbor, catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore, Dream, Discover. –Mark Twain
Life is 10% what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it. –Charles Swindoll
The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any. –Alice Walker
The mind is everything. What you think you become. –Buddha
The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now. –Chinese Proverb
An unexamined life is not worth living. –Socrates
Eighty percent of success is showing up. –Woody Allen
Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. –Steve Jobs
Winning isn’t everything, but wanting to win is. –Vince Lombardi
I am not a product of my circumstances. I am a product of my decisions. –Stephen Covey
Every child is an artist. The problem is how to remain an artist once he grows up. –Pablo Picasso
You can never cross the ocean until you have the courage to lose sight of the shore. –Christopher Columbus
I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. –Maya Angelou
Either you run the day, or the day runs you. –Jim Rohn
Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right. –Henry Ford
The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why. –Mark Twain
Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it. –Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
The best revenge is massive success. –Frank Sinatra
People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing. That’s why we recommend it daily. –Zig Ziglar
Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage. –Anais Nin
If you hear a voice within you say “you cannot paint,” then by all means paint and that voice will be silenced. –Vincent Van Gogh
There is only one way to avoid criticism: do nothing, say nothing, and be nothing. –Aristotle
Ask and it will be given to you; search, and you will find; knock and the door will be opened for you. –Jesus
The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be. –Ralph Waldo Emerson
Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined. –Henry David Thoreau
When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left and could say, I used everything you gave me. –Erma Bombeck
Few things can help an individual more than to place responsibility on him, and to let him know that you trust him. –Booker T. Washington
Certain things catch your eye, but pursue only those that capture the heart. – Ancient Indian Proverb
Believe you can and you’re halfway there. –Theodore Roosevelt
Everything you’ve ever wanted is on the other side of fear. –George Addair
We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light. –Plato
Teach thy tongue to say, “I do not know,” and thous shalt progress. –Maimonides
Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can. –Arthur Ashe
When I was 5 years old, my mother always told me that happiness was the key to life. When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down ‘happy’. They told me I didn’t understand the assignment, and I told them they didn’t understand life. –John Lennon
Fall seven times and stand up eight. –Japanese Proverb
When one door of happiness closes, another opens, but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us. –Helen Keller
Everything has beauty, but not everyone can see. –Confucius
How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world. –Anne Frank
When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be. –Lao Tzu
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away. –Maya Angelou
Happiness is not something readymade. It comes from your own actions. –Dalai Lama
If you’re offered a seat on a rocket ship, don’t ask what seat! Just get on. –Sheryl Sandberg
First, have a definite, clear practical ideal; a goal, an objective. Second, have the necessary means to achieve your ends; wisdom, money, materials, and methods. Third, adjust all your means to that end. –Aristotle
If the wind will not serve, take to the oars. –Latin Proverb
You can’t fall if you don’t climb. But there’s no joy in living your whole life on the ground. –Unknown
We must believe that we are gifted for something, and that this thing, at whatever cost, must be attained. –Marie Curie
Too many of us are not living our dreams because we are living our fears. –Les Brown
Challenges are what make life interesting and overcoming them is what makes life meaningful. –Joshua J. Marine
If you want to lift yourself up, lift up someone else. –Booker T. Washington
I have been impressed with the urgency of doing. Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Being willing is not enough; we must do. –Leonardo da Vinci
Limitations live only in our minds. But if we use our imaginations, our possibilities become limitless. –Jamie Paolinetti
You take your life in your own hands, and what happens? A terrible thing, no one to blame. –Erica Jong
What’s money? A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and goes to bed at night and in between does what he wants to do. –Bob Dylan
I didn’t fail the test. I just found 100 ways to do it wrong. –Benjamin Franklin
In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure. –Bill Cosby
A person who never made a mistake never tried anything new. – Albert Einstein
The person who says it cannot be done should not interrupt the person who is doing it. –Chinese Proverb
There are no traffic jams along the extra mile. –Roger Staubach
It is never too late to be what you might have been. –George Eliot
You become what you believe. –Oprah Winfrey
I would rather die of passion than of boredom. –Vincent van Gogh
A truly rich man is one whose children run into his arms when his hands are empty. –Unknown
It is not what you do for your children, but what you have taught them to do for themselves, that will make them successful human beings. –Ann Landers
If you want your children to turn out well, spend twice as much time with them, and half as much money. –Abigail Van Buren
Build your own dreams, or someone else will hire you to build theirs. –Farrah Gray
The battles that count aren’t the ones for gold medals. The struggles within yourself–the invisible battles inside all of us–that’s where it’s at. –Jesse Owens
Education costs money. But then so does ignorance. –Sir Claus Moser
I have learned over the years that when one’s mind is made up, this diminishes fear. –Rosa Parks
It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop. –Confucius
If you look at what you have in life, you’ll always have more. If you look at what you don’t have in life, you’ll never have enough. –Oprah Winfrey
Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck. –Dalai Lama
You can’t use up creativity. The more you use, the more you have. –Maya Angelou
Dream big and dare to fail. –Norman Vaughan
Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter. –Martin Luther King Jr.
Do what you can, where you are, with what you have. –Teddy Roosevelt
If you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you’ve always gotten. –Tony Robbins
Dreaming, after all, is a form of planning. –Gloria Steinem
It’s your place in the world; it’s your life. Go on and do all you can with it, and make it the life you want to live. –Mae Jemison
You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don’t try. –Beverly Sills
Remember no one can make you feel inferior without your consent. –Eleanor Roosevelt
Life is what we make it, always has been, always will be. –Grandma Moses
The question isn’t who is going to let me; it’s who is going to stop me. –Ayn Rand
When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it. –Henry Ford
It’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years. –Abraham Lincoln
Change your thoughts and you change your world. –Norman Vincent Peale
Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing. –Benjamin Franklin
Nothing is impossible, the word itself says, “I’m possible!” –Audrey Hepburn
The only way to do great work is to love what you do. –Steve Jobs
If you can dream it, you can achieve it. –Zig Ziglar
A good teacher must know how to arouse the interest of the pupil in the field of study for which he is responsible.
Some people excel in mastering the knowledge. Some people are skillful in imparting the knowledge. A teacher is the one who possesses both these qualities and hence is referred to as a treasure of knowledge.
The “message” of the teacher to the students is not merely to impart knowledge content of books which is largely information fast getting out of date. But more than that it should be inspiration, by his/her example, towards the process of character building and the use of knowledge for welfare of the community. The total message to the students, and to the community, is the total life of the teacher.
Daulat Singh Kothari
One good school master is worth a thousand priests.
May all knowledge come together and become radiant. A teacher gives knowledge to his student and enlightens him. Thereafter students give knowledge to someone else. In this way, one enlightens the other and knowledge increases . Increasing knowledge by knowledge is know as the Jnana Yagya. The ultimate aim of a Yagya is to increase the glory of knowledge.
The mediocre teacher tells. The good teacher explains. The superior teacher demonstrates. The great teacher inspires.
William Arthur Ward
What is life coaching?
Life coaching is a means of helping an individual make the best of their life and the opportunities that arise. A life coach will help and guide a client make decisions that the client feels would lead to a more fulfilling and purposeful life. This is achieved via strategies and constant motivation.
The actual coaching focuses on the client’s present and future life to determine which areas of their life to develop and how to go about it. In a nutshell, life coaching can be described as a cognitive behavioural therapy which is designed to increase a client’s personal happiness.
The idea is that by helping the individual to personal fulfilment, he or she will not only be happier, but also feel less stressed and able to cope better with day-to-day life and relationships – both personal and work-based.
Life coaches say the therapy can benefit anyone from all ages of life and socio-economic background. It can be directed towards eg getting a new job, more fulfilling personal relationships, passing exams, achieving work success, even writing a book. They insist that sessions with a life coach is not the same as talking with family or friends as the latter may have a vested interest in the client remaining in his or her current situation.
A session with a life coach is not the same as seeing a psychologist or psychiatrist (although both have a policy of never passing judgement on their client). The mental health professional will both look at emotional and psychological issues which are causing a client’s present life difficulty such as depression, addiction etc and try to solve them via an examination of the client’s past life. Life coaching, on the other hand, focuses on the present and future and is geared towards helping the client choose particular goals then assisting him or her in their pursuit of them.
A study in by the The International Coach Federation in 1998 reported that of the individuals surveyed, 67 per cent said they achieved an increased self-awareness, 57 per cent reported lower stress levels, 62 per cent said they were now better at goal-setting, 60 per cent reported having a more balanced life and 52 per cent said their self-confidence had definitely improved.
What to expect
Life coaching sessions can be done face-to-face in a consulting room or the therapists home. They can also be carried out, as is increasingly popular, by telephone. Those who conduct coaching sessions by telephone say it means no lengthy travel for their clients and the client feels more relaxed speaking in the privacy of their own home.
Telephone sessions typically last from 30 minutes up to one hour and are usually weekly, although gaps between appointments can vary from therapist to therapist. Clients sometimes have just the one session or they can end up working with their coach for several months to a year. The client and the life coach usually decide on a pre-arranged time to call.
Sessions, which are always confidential, are usually relaxed and positive experiences.
The life coach will ask particular questions about you and your lifestyle, motivations, aims etc. Over the course of the first sessions and follow-up appointments they will point you towards understanding your actions and motivations then, with your help, assist you in reaching your goals. Many coaches achieve this by means of a version of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP).
Over the course of several sessions trust should build up between yourself and the life coach and it should feel like a ‘partnership.’ This will allow the life coach to offer you new perspectives, encouragement and help you identify the self-imposed obstacles in your life which you have erected. Once the obstacles have been identified, the therapist will then help you work towards your goals step by step.
It is a good idea, prior to meeting your life coach, to try and work out for yourself what goals you would like to achieve through the sessions and whether you feel you are at the point in life where you could benefit from a life coach in terms of allowing yourself to benefit from the experience.
Your coach will give you ‘homework’ ie tasks which are custom-made to your life and which will help you learn the psychological tools you need to reach your goals. He or she will also provide a strategy to help you master these exercises.
Effects and benefits
One of the major benefits of life coaching is in helping the client deal with the issue of procrastination and get on with the decisions they consciously or unconsciously need to make to better reach their goals. In working towards purposeful goals, the client gets a confidence boost and their self-esteem should improve. This, in turn, makes them feel happier and more relaxed as individuals. Life coaches claim the benefits of the therapy, provided the techniques and strategies are practiced properly, can be long-lasting and extremely effective.
Other benefits of life coaching include:
Better time management and organisational skills
Improved relationships at work and home
Allowing you to identify priorities in life
Gaining strategies to conquer all fears
A shortened time-frame between desiring and achieving your goals
Achieving a better balance between your work and extra-curricular life
Improved health and fitness (or at least the motivation to attain it)
Conquering public speaking
Helping you tackle and beat that ‘to do’ list
Becoming more career focused and successful
Living the type of life you’ve always wanted
Learning to take action and keep the momentum going (ie make your New Year resolutions last!)
Gives you a purpose in life
Have you ever tried Life Coaching?. Do share your experience by adding comments to this post.
For further questions and discussion, visit our healing section.
What is Reiki?
Reiki is an invisible, gentle energy that works by balancing an individual’s energy systems - physical, mental, emotional and spiritual - and in that way promotes the body's own natural ability to heal. It is a non-invasive therapy which aims to treat holistically and to restore homeostasis (whole-body balance).
Constructed from two Japanese words rei meaning "Universal Spirit," and ki meaning "life force energy," the combined word has the meaning of cosmic or sacred universal energy or life force. Reiki is an ancient hands-on healing technique that claims the power to use this force to heal, by balancing the subtle energies within our bodies.
Reiki energy has several basic effects: it brings about deep relaxation, assists in the release of energy blockages, and increases the vibrational frequency of the body to provide new vitality.
The Reiki practitioner, who has been initiated and trained to become attuned to this healing energy, serves as a channel to direct those energies to where they are needed. Reiki's ki-energies flow from the practitioner's body through the palms of the hands to the recipient's body.
Reiki is believed to have originated in Tibet many thousands of years ago and that the original system of healing was lost. In the mid-1800s that Dr. Mikao Usui rediscovered Reiki. He carried out a 21-year-long study that involved learning about history’s great spiritual leaders, the study of Buddhist teachings and ancient sounds and symbols linked to the human body and nervous system. He also learned the technique to use the life force energy to heal. Subsequently, Usui is claimed to have undergone a metaphysical experience and became empowered to use the ancient system of healing. It is now widely used throughout the western world as a popular means of relaxing, calming and healing.
The underlying principles of Reiki recommend a design for living in balance with all others and with nature. These are the FIVE PRINCIPLES of Reiki:
Just for today I will not be angry.
Just for today I will not worry.
Earn your living honestly.
Honour your parents, teachers and elders.
Show gratitude to every living thing.
Because the study and practise of Reiki encourages personal or spiritual development, Reiki may help with a wide range of issues and conditions, as it puts the whole individual - body and soul - in the best position to create a more harmonious and well-balanced life style.
The Effects and Benefits
Users of Reiki report that they experience relaxation, and a calm, peaceful sense of well-being on all levels. As illness contributes to stress, Reiki is often used to alleviate the anxiety that accompanies many conditions.
Since Reiki aims to embody a four-fold approach, its benefits are listed under all four areas of human existence. These are some of the conditions with which people approach Reiki, in the hope of relief for the accompanying symptoms.
Physical conditions: Back pain. Headaches, Migraines. Fibromyalgia. General tiredness and Chronic Fatigue. Skin disorders. Auto-immune disorders. Cancer. Thyroid imbalances. Reiki is known to Speed Recovery after Surgery and Injury
Emotional conditions: Fears and Panic. Low self-esteem. Emotional disengagement, remoteness. Inability to cope. Feeling inadequate or out of place. Anger or jealousy. Grief and bereavement. Reiki has been found to sooth and comfort people in times of personal stress and crisis.
Mental conditions: Variety of Stress-related conditions: From Anxiety and Depression to Confusion and Lack of concentration. ADD & ADHD (Attention Deficit & Hyperactive disorders. Sleep problems and Negative thinking. On the positive side, Reiki has been found to aid Inner Clarity, Wisdom, Intuition and Awareness, and some use this aspect to prepare for an exam or work challenge.
Spiritual conditions: Disconnection from self & life. Spiritual seeking. Loss of personal power. Not knowing life direction or purpose. Being haunted by the past, and unable to forgive. Fear of death. There are many cases in which individuals with chronic and terminal conditions have chosen Reiki energy in their last moments to ease and help them accept the process of the process of death.
Reiki is concerned with the person and not the symptom, it can be effective more widely than the condition for which the client presented.
Have you ever tried Reiki. Do share your experience by adding comments to this post.
For further questions and discussion visit our healing section.
A question often comes into my mind……… What exactly is surrender? Whenever you are in some problem you often here, just surrender to God….. just surrender to his will…… what does this phrase exactly mean??? How to surrender, what to surrender??
In my opinion there is another phrase that explains it better……. Go with the flow…… trusting the universe(God) that He has a plan for you.
This doesn’t mean that u shouldn’t have opinions or choices, or you shouldn’t make efforts to achieve ur goals. it just means that even if your choices are not fulfilled, having faith that it’s for the best.
It’s a beautiful experience to just wait and watch what life has to offer you, picking up the opportunities thrown in your way.
Just for today have faith that the Almighty has a plan for you, and whatever comes your way, happiness, sadness, love, hate whatever….. just embrace it…… Believe from the bottom of your heart that there is a far greater reason behind everything……
When a twig is floating in the sea, you can just see the few nearby waves pushing and pulling the twig up and down, but in actual, what is going on below the surface, what is causing the way, we cannot see. Respect the fact that you cannot have all the answers all the time, you can’t understand everything.
This universe is a beautiful….. beautiful place…… and everything is so organized…. So how can we doubt that we are not taken care of???? How can we doubt ????
Surrender to me means having faith.
And taking the leap of faith is as easy as blinking your eyes, our mind complicates it.
Faith is a wonderful thing, it can move mountains.
Just give it a try, and see how amazing your life becomes.
Ups and Downs comes into your life. Infact, I’m writing this coz recently I have been suffering from so much stress, that’s when I realized that I’m not going with the flow.
So, just for today I’m taking that leap of faith, surrendering myself, and enjoying the ride.
Dual aspect of our life - "Things are getting worse and Things are getting better" - the catch is both are happening simultaneously, but somehow we are observing only one facet at a time, which in result is giving us an instant reason to either feel the blues or to sense the delight............................................................Balance between the two will prevail.
It was on October 20th 2004, we started Spicy Flavours , and as we reach Oct 20th 2012 , we will be completing 8 years of our online existence !!!
We meet online to have a great time.......
We laugh and we giggle and smile at our screens,
We sit back and wonder what all this means.
We surf the web, we travel afar,
We span thousand of miles without a car.
We watch conversations flowing on the screen,
We tell jokes and stories and know what they mean
We are the CIRCLE OF FRIENDS at Spicy Flavours made from a chain
And we're here bcoz friendship is what we gain!
Born on-line formed by few,
We had no idea just wat to do.
So we are linking our pages, first one then two,
And wonder where we'll end up when we are through
The Circle will spread, like a wild vine,
It will breathe and whisper like the winds of time.
We have also added facebook event - We would appreciate your presence for the celebration of a successful journey
Check out some of the very exciting / popular topics on SF as a start up Guide
Look forward to continue adding enthusiasm to your emotions
Team Spicy Flavours
As the friendship day is just around the corner, Every one is busy searching for heartrending lines which can be presented to his/her very special frd. For the same reason, I thought to write this entry.
So here is the very special package which can be very effective for expressing your friendship on this friendship day. Before we start opening our collection , we wish you and your friends , the very best wishes for the everlasting bond of friendship you have.
To begin with...
Heartrending Text Sms Lines
Friendship SMS Collection
wo aur koi nahi, Use DOST kehlate hai.
2 GOLDEN Phrases of friendship
2 GOLDEN Phrases of friendship: "don't believe the doubted One"...& "don't doubt the belived One".! That retains friendship for a longer time
Apki dosti me
Poems to Celebrate Friendship day
poems about friend
How wonderfull You Are...
I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....
My Beautiful Friend
A vanished friend...(poet anonymous)
Let's Build A Box Of Friendship
Friendship !!! (In Hindi)
How can u be friends with someone you've never met
WHY DO V NEED FRIENDS
Hug of friendship
Apni to duniya hi doston se
Think of a friend!!
r v friends or r v not?...?ans me..plz..
Powerpoint greetings to Celebrate Friendship day
And for those who are alone today , You are welcome to join Pal's Cafe
Swap Expert Remarks on Friendship day
Friendship day celebrations : How u planing
Friends are the Precious ~ Gift from God!!!
Poll Question: Do you keep in touch with old school friends?
Poll Question: Which type of friendship do you prefer?
Happy Friendship Day
The Circle Of Friends
Can Boys and Girls really be friends
Hope you all will love this package!!!!
We are thankful to all our members for their contributions
Cheer up and have the very best friendship day.
Whenever we see romantic movies, so many times we say, “I wish there was someone who would love me like this”. Or if we already have someone by our side we generally say, “look, that’s so sweet, you never do something like that for me”.
Stop and give it a thought, how many times do we say, “I wish, I could love someone that way”? How many times have we thought about giving love, about enriching someone else’s life with our love?? Never , or maybe just few times, but not much.
We always ask, what will we gain, what am I getting from relationship, we never think about giving. We always crib about how u feel that other person doesn’t love you anymore …… blah blah blah …….. but we never stop to think that other person might also be feeling the same thing. Love is not about how happy the other person makes you, its about how happy do you make the other person. Now some of us will be thinking, oh! I think about my partner all the time, I always give him/her my best, I do this and that for them. Beware , Be aware, there is no such thing as unselfish deed in this world. Whenever u do something you do it for your own self. Think about it, when you do something for your partner, you do it coz it makes your partner happy, which in turn makes you happy, or u might do things coz you think they are your responsibilities, But you do it for your own self. Be aware of this , take responsibilities for your action.
But even if we do all of the above things, there still remains a emptiness inside somewhere. A craving for something unknown. That emptiness can only be filled by His Love. The unconditional love. Love that is not limited to just one person, love that knows no limits. You see, human relationships are not meant to satisfy you, they never satisfy you eternally. No matter how strong bond you share with another human being, it will fade away eventually.
Human relations are like mock tests, just to make our preparations better. We have to dissolve in another human being before we can dissolve in That Ultimate.
Love is a subjective term. Everyone has his/her own defination of love. But one universal defination might be that “Love is a feeling”. That’s it, love is a feeling. But nnnoooo …… its not enough for our minds, how can it be, it has no conditions, no limits?? We crave to be loved that too on our own terms and conditions. Anything less won’t do. Can we be more selfish? Actually, that’s the wrong question. The question is, how ignorant can we be, not to see this? Not to be aware what our mind and ego is doing to our love and relationships???
(This article is inspired by- Osho)
Don't let your background put your back on the ground.
Where you come from doesn't define where you are going to.
The secret is to stay focused & never for one second lose sight of what you really want out of life.
A 9 year old boy went to an ICE CREAM parlor.
Waiter: What do you want?
Boy: How much a CONE ICE CREAM costs?
Then the BOY checked his pocket & asked cost of small cone?
Irritated Waiter angrily said: Rs.12/-
Boy ordered a small cone, had it, paid bill & left.
When the waiter came to pick the EMPTY PLATE
tears rolled down from his eyes.
The boy had
left Rs.3 as TIP for him.
"MAKE EVERYONE HAPPY WITH
SOMETHING YOU HAVE"
Source - Facebook status of Niyati Mehta